One of the most dangerous mind games you can play with yourself is inquiring, “what if I fail?” That question will have your brain spinning out of control in a desperate effort to soothe the dull pain of what it presumes will happen if you fail.
The real question is, why is everyone so afraid of failure, though?
I think part of this is the reality that we live in a time where most of what we see is the highlight reel. Social media can appear to be a diary, but what we’re seeing isn’t usually the difficult stuff, it’s the joy, the laughter, the victories. This can subconsciously train us to only want to be open with the good times while deleting the outtakes- the “failures” we don’t want anyone else to see.
What happens when we see only the highlights is that we determine that failure isn’t normal and that if we want to appear successful we only get one shot, and it has to be the right shot. This couldn’t be more wrong. You see, success is built on “failures” because all a failure essentially is is a learning experience that catapults you to wisdom and growth if you absorb the lesson.
What it all comes down to is this: would you rather take a chance or would you rather wonder, “what if?”
One of the most common fears of failure is in regards to dating. Are you going to break down your walls and risk being susceptible to hurt or missing good times with someone special (even if it’s only with “Mr. Right Now”) because you’re afraid of failure? A love gone wrong is never a failure. Rather, it’s a lesson in what you want or don’t want from a future partner, or some insight on what you need to personally work on before your next relationship. Stop being afraid and instead be ready and open. You can’t experience a successful relationship if you don’t overcome the fear of a potentially unsuccessful relationship.
How about that career move you’ve been wanting to make? Are you not going to do it and always wonder “what if I had tried?” If it doesn’t work out, it’s never too late to start over again, but it’s always too late if you’re forever sitting around wondering, “what if I had done that thing I’ve always wanted to do?”
Here’s the point. If you take the chance at something, it might not work out and you may have to dream again, or it just might actually work out and you may have the opportunity of living your best life. Nothing is ever a true failure if it taught you something or made you happy even if only for a season.
You’ll never find success if you’re always afraid of failing, and if you’re always afraid of failing, you’ll never try. So, swallow your pride and just do it. Try. Eventually you will experience success.